So you’re depressed and oh-so saddened and maybe feeling a little sickly.
All because your fortieth birthday is approaching rather quickly.
You’re all stressed out and mortified.
You think life will never be the same.
Up till now your life’s been fascinating And you’re worried that after 40 it’ll be lame.
You need to relax and get on with your life in the end, your worries are not all that real.
It’s just a birthday like all the others. So what if you can remember the inventing of the wheel.
So embrace your friends and thank the well-wishers that sing “Happy Birthday” to you like they were a choir.
And when they light the candles on your cake, pray and hope they don’t start your home on fire.
It doesn’t matter what your personality is, whether you’re casual, serious, deep thinking, or sporty.
You might as well enjoy the party because whats the alternative to turning forty?
So cheer up my friend, it could be so much worse.
And in the end, everything will be just fine because remember the only true way to avoid turning forty, is to die at thirty-nine.

James McClarty-Lopes has been living with HIV for over 10 years. He is a chef and an athlete. I can’t embed his video, but please take a look. His attitude and the fact that he is living a very full, healthy life is an inspiration.

At the 2011 Out & Equal Workplace Summit, I met two gentlemen who are HIV positive. One has been living with it for 27 years and the other for 25. They are healthy and living good lives.

Today HIV is not a death sentence. It doesn’t mean you are doomed to get AIDS. It is considered a treatable, chronic disease that is no different than if you were diagnosed with diabetes. We have progressed far. This doesn’t mean we need to be complacent.

• There still is no cure for HIV, those infected will have it for the rest of their life.  Remind your friends and family of this fact.
• We must continue to raise awareness like we once did.
• Tell your friends, whether they be straight, gay or bi to always be safe.
• Cross-post this blog entry on Facebook and Twitter. Have them watch the videos.

For many years I had psoriasis and in late May 2011, I finally made an appointment with the dermatologist, but because of being short staffed, they couldn’t take me until August 10th. I will get back to this in a little bit. In early June 2011 I got what I thought was a very bad gum infection to the point where I had all the symptoms of the flu. For those who know me, I almost never get sick. My school mates might recall that I rarely was absent. On June 6, the day after I walked in the Asbury Park pride parade, I was rushed to the hospital with a 103 degree fever. I was so sick, I had to be in a wheelchair. St. Peters did a great job and got my fever down a few hours later, but I was sick for weeks. Once I recovered, I developed Bell’s Palsy. Having the right side of your face paralyzed was very frightening. It was like I had a stroke. Eating was physically exhausting for me and whatever I ate, I could not taste. I also had diarrhea and almost no energy. I often went home sick or simply too tired to keep working. The Bell’s subsided after eleven days and I made a full recovery. The diarrhea continued and I started to have a lot of pain, as if I had a hemorrhoid.

On August 1st I was going to Las Vegas with my friends and I wasn’t going to let anything stop me from going. I can live with the diarrhea and pain, but I still didn’t have a normal energy level. A few days before my trip, I noticed that my skin was getting these little dots on it and the big patch of psoriasis on my right calf went almost around my whole leg. I was concerned about what they were, but since I was going to the dermatologist in a few days, it wasn’t a big deal. The trip was fun, despite the pain and low energy levels. I saw the dermatologist and they said that the breakout all over my body was psoriasis. The treatment for the kind of psoriasis is a drug called Enbrel. The problem with Enbrel is that it weakens your immune system, so I had a battery of tests done. My liver and kidney functions are fine nor do I don’t have hepatitis, herpes or syphilis. What they didn’t like was my western blot test. It came back with an inconclusive result. For those that do not know, the western blot checks for HIV. Having a “balanced” result as the doctor put it, doesn’t mean that I have HIV, just that there is some kind of antibody in my immune system. Thinking that I just had a gum infection, this makes sense. My body still had the antibodies from fighting that off. As a precaution, my dermatologist recommended that I see an infectious disease doctor to get a more comprehensive set of tests to check my immune system.

I was an emotional basket case, as my friends and co-workers can attest. For those that are my friends on Facebook, you may recall that I posted some rather cryptic Facebook status messages about tests.  I was very scared, thinking that I could die.

I went to the infectious disease doctor and he explained to me that goodness forbid that I am positive, that I won’t die and that it is a treatable disease, no worse than someone having diabetes.  It’s just simply a chronic illness.  While this made me feel better, the specter of having HIV still scared me.  I thought, what if I did have it?  With the layoffs at work, I’ll never find another job again.  No one in my right mind would insure me (I recently found out this is illegal).  How would my friends, family and co-workers react?  Would I get an “I told you so” lecture, will my parents cry?  Will my co-workers be afraid to sit near me or have a munchkin or bagel after I did?  With the way I was feeling physically, I thought, “do I not have HIV, but AIDS?”

I went for the blood test and for over a week I thought about these things.  Thanks to my wonderful best friend and others (but how Neil put up with me will forever be a mystery) , my mind was continuously put at ease.  My physical symptoms were not getting much better.  I was constantly getting up several times at night to go to the bathroom and the psoriasis continued to spread.  Finally it was the day of my appointment.  I was mentally prepared to be told that beyond a reasonable doubt that I was HIV positive.

I was right.

The doctor, like pulling off a bandage, told me that I indeed am HIV positive.  He then showed me the ten or so tests in which a vast majority said “positive.”  My heart sank.  He then proceeded to explain that it was caught early.  He went on to state that my liver and kidneys are all functioning normally.  I do not have toxoplasmosis.  I do not have any form of hepatitis, syphilis or tuberculosis.  He then stated that my viral load is quite low and my CD 4 count is high (that’s a good thing).  He said he sees no reason why my HIV cannot be completely suppressed.  He put me on a medication called Atripla, which are three medicines combined into one.  While I may work for Merck, I am thankful to the folks at Bristol-Meyers Squibb and Gilead for making this medication.  The worst side effect are a rash and scary dreams, which is why they say to take it at night.

How did my friends, co-workers and family react?  One member of the Merck Rainbow Alliance jumped back and looked at me like I was a leper before catching their self (and I wasn’t surprised by this one person’s reaction).  Other than that, my friends, co-workers and family reacted with caring and support.  No “I told you so” and my co-workers have treated me no differently than they have before.  I am also very thankful to have a very supportive boss who has allowed me the great flexibility of time to go see my various doctors.  I truly have the best boss in the world with Mike Landsman.

I have been lucky, no scary dreams, just vivid ones that makes sleeping fun.  After 2½ weeks taking Atripla, my diarrhea has gone away and thanks to a combination of another drug and lightbox treatments, my psoriasis is slowly fading and the chicken pox-like itching has become only a distant memory.  A recent follow-up visit to the doctor reaffirmed my very, very good prognosis with my illness.  He thinks that at the rate I am going, my viral load may drop to undetectable levels and that I may even be able to take the immune-whacking Enbrel.  There is no reason why I can’t live to be a very old man.

There you have it, as promised, “my big announcement.”  If you did read this almost 1,500 word blog posting, I thank you.  I want to use my experience with HIV as a lesson.  I am very open about it and please, feel free to ask me questions, whether it be on my web site or in the comments section of the Facebook cross-posting and re-post!

Meanwhile I have had some interesting adventures. In August I went to Las Vegas for Defcon 19 and had a good time. My best friend Neil gave an excellent talk on cryptography and steganography. In mid October I went to Indianapolis to visit Neil and Mark. I had a wonderful time seeing the city, Neil’s new apartment, his new car and my friend and ex-coworker, Casey. Next week I’m off to Dallas for Out & Equal which should be a lot of fun.

Click on the picture to get the non-cropped version.

On another note, I added a Google Latitude widget to my sidebar. Anyone reading this on Facebook should go to my blog at www.starthan.net to know what I am talking about.

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Dear Dr. Laura:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God’s Law.  I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can.  When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly state it to be an abomination … End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other elements of God’s Laws and how to follow them.

1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations.  A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians.  Can you clarify?  Why can’t I own Canadians?

2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7.  In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness – Lev.15: 19-24.  The problem is how do I tell?  I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord – Lev.1:9.  The problem is my neighbors.  They claim the odor is not pleasing to them.  Should I smite them?

5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath.  Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death.  Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?

6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination, Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality.  I don’t agree.  Can you settle this?  Are there ‘degrees’ of abomination?

7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight.  I have to admit that I wear reading glasses.  Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle-room here?

8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27.  How should they die?

9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves

10. My uncle has a farm.  He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend).  He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot.  Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? Lev.24:10-16.  Couldn’t we just burn them to death at a private family affair, like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy considerable expertise in such matters, so I’m confident you can help.

Thank you again for reminding us that God’s word is eternal and unchanging.

Your adoring fan.
James M. Kauffman, Ed.D. Professor Emeritus, Dept. Of Curriculum, Instruction, and Special Education University of Virginia

BY SALLY REED

Michael Bernstein was not always a morning person.  How many 12-year-olds are? 

Now he’s the early riser in the family, popping out of bed and perching before the computer well before breakfast.  Michael devotes some mornings to his science-fiction writing, or to one of his own fantasy games in progress. Other days, he creates original tunes using a music-composition package.   Depending on the day of the week, he may review his spelling lists, studying words he’s not yet mastered as they flash on screen.  He polishes school reports using a word processor.  Last spring, he spent several morning hours putting the finishing touches on his Bar Mitzvah speech.

“Michael’s whole attitude toward homework has changed.” reports his mother, Carol Bernstein.  “He’s more willing to do it, correct it, and check his spelling because it’s all much easier with the computer. His teachers are pleased because his work is more legible and his homework grades have actually improved.”

Like kids across the country, from elementary to high school age, Michael has learned how to make the educational most of his computer. These kids and their families are pioneers, following new paths to learning in the home.

TODAY’S TRAILBLAZERS

Like any trailblazers, the Bemsteins have encountered obstacles. Confusing, misleading information; an absence of coherent studies that point to the one or two most obvious benefits of learning at home with the computer; and uncertainty about their own combined roles as parents and teachers: these are just a few of the roadblocks that make computer-age parenting tough. But with perseverance and a little guidance from people who know, parents have been able to make good educational use of the computer.  Whether it’s making noticeable Improvement in writing and spelling, plunging into new worlds, exploring science, solving problems and puzzles, fiddling with circuits and logic gates, exploring new. creative horizons, gaining confidence in school, growing used to the computer as an invaluable productive tool, or a combination of all the above, kids of all ages have found the machine to be an Invaluable educational companion.