Category: Personal

My Trip to Indiana–October 17–20, 2026

I decided to start blogging again. My life isn’t that exciting that a blog is necessary, but it is a good way of sharing my thoughts. I suppose this makes my thoughts public, but since few know of my blog, it comes down to security through obscurity.

Sleep

I slept very well last night. Due to a personal situation, I felt it necessary to take a bit more “sleep aid” than usual. I slept for 8 hrs 40 minutes with being asleep 88% of my total duration in bed. I allude to this situation in the post below.

Trip to Indiana

October 17th

Last week, October 17-20 I returned to Indiana to see my friend, Neil. This is the first time I’ve been to Indiana in over ten years. With Neil moving around so much, I never thought I would be back in Indiana. Since this travel involves Newark Liberty International Airport, it is always a bit of a crapshoot if the travel would be problem free. My flight was at 6:57 AM and boarding was at 6:34 AM. I left my house at 3:58 AM and got to the off-airport parking around 4:30 AM. I had to wait a few minutes for the shuttle, but I was at the airport by 5 AM. I was pleasantly surprised in that the TSA process went smoothly and efficiently, even for that time in the morning. I was at the gate one hour before boarding. For those who know me, “only” being an hour early is personal growth. The flight not only took off early from Newark but landed early at Indianapolis. The only unexpected event was that I had to gate check my duffel bag. It is the first time I ever had to gate check a bag. Upon arrival, I was told to not wait at the gate for the bag but rather go to carousel 2. I high-tailed it to the carousel and to my pleasant surprise, my bag (which had no identification on it) was one of the first off of the carousel. Neil met me within 2 minutes of my arrival at the carousel.

We went to Garden Table on Mass Ave. for brunch. I had to drink, a “Hoosier Heater” which contained apple, spinach, kale, cilantro (barely tasted the soap), jalapeño, and lime. It had a nice kick to it and I was thirsty from the travel (a glass of water and a stroopwaffel only goes so far). To eat, I had a nice omelette.

After brunch we went to the Indiana State Museum, which I went to many years earlier. I really enjoy visiting that museum and learning about the notable people of Indiana as well as its rich history.

In the afternoon, Neil, Alex, and I went to see Tron: Ares (3D) in their town of Columbus, Indiana. The nice thing about seeing a movie in a small town in a small state (population wise) is that there are less people at the theater. For our showing of the movie, we were the only ones in the theater (4 PM on a Friday). It was like we had a private showing. Alex didn’t like that, he prefers full theaters. Well, I liked it.

In the evening we had dinner at the Upland Brewing Company. They are a small chain with locations in Indianapolis, Bloomington, Jeffersonville, and Carmel. In the past I have been to the one in Bloomington. I had a burger which was ok, but it had these “hard things” in it that made me not finish it, however, the potato salad was good. Neil and Alex had nachos which they said wasn’t very good. If we went again, I’d likely order something different.

October 18th

On the 18th we first went to Nashville, Indiana. For those familiar with New Hope, PA, it is very much like that, but with better parking. It is an artist’s mecca filled with many cute shops featuring everything from books to crafts. We had brunch there at The Bird’s Nest Cafe. I had some really good French Toast. October 18th was also the day of, what turned out to be, an international No Kings Day protest. In ruby red Indiana I was pleasantly surprised to see such a turnout in Nashville, which is in Brown County.

After Nashville, we went to Bloomington, IN. Alex had homework to do so we dropped him off at IU’s Herman B. Wells Library. I wanted to see the Janeway statue and as luck would have it, we found a space less than two minute’s walk from it.

We walked around campus and ran into Bloomington’s No Kings protest. The turnout in Bloomington was impressive, even if the town is one of the “blue” hotspots of Indiana. The other two are in northwest Indiana in Lake County (near Chicago) and in Indianapolis.

Neil and I relaxed at The Tap Room and had some beers as we watched the IU game (they won). The three of us had dinner at The Uptown Cafe. I had the mushroom jumbalaya which was very good. Afterwards, we went to The Comedy Attic where we saw Nico Carney. Nico was quite funny, their act was mostly regarding life as a transgender person.

October 19th

We had brunch in Columbus at a nice little cafe whose name I forgot. I had an omelette with a side of fruit and a gigantic cup of coffee. We dropped Alex off at a building that he needed to view for some homework he had to do. Neil and I then headed east, first to check out a dispensary in Ohio and then off to Cincinatti to the Hard Rock Casino. We signed up for their free casino cards and got a good deal, $25 in slot play and $25 for food. I was able to stretch that $25 out for quite a few hours. In total, I lost $125. For lunch we had decent pizza and considering it was free, it was a good deal. On the drive back a wrong turn was made and we were briefly in Kentucky.

October 20th

This was a travel day. For various reasons, I did not sleep well. Let’s just say there was a discussion on the way back from Cincinatti that I will never forget. Neil got up early and we drove to the airport. After a brief stop to get fuel and something to drink, the GPS got a bit confused and thought we needed to drive south to the airport. Luckily Neil knew the way and the GPS eventually corrected itself. This was also during the global AWS outage. The two possibly could be related. We got to the airport about 45 minutes before boarding. Neil and I sat down and had a nice chat, then I hugged him goodbye and went to TSA. Surprisingly, TSA out of Indianapolis was slightly more difficult than Newark. I had to go through extra screening due to the size of toothpaste I brought with me. Oddly enough, it wasn’t an issue flying out. I got to the gate about 10 minutes before boarding. Luckily, going back I did not have to gate check my bag. The flight took off early and we landed early (at Newark!). The process for getting the off-airport parking shuttle has changed but was great. The app automatically knows your location and notifies for pickup, no calling necessary. I found the car easily in the large lot (I wrote down the parking space number). The drive back via the NJ Turnpike was uneventful and I got home at 11:58 AM full of memories of a good time and that of a difficult conversation, that I hope someday leads to growth and a stronger friendship…or no friendship at all.

Remembering April

This week my furry four-footed great dane “niece” crossed the Rainbow Bridge. At some point I will have more to say, but for now, please take a look at this tribute video slideshow that I made.

My July Adventure Home from Colorado

Originally written on July 7th, 2020. This sequence of events, in my opinion, led to my immune system weakening and getting COVID-19.

As I begin writing this, it is 7:30 AM eastern time on July 7, 2020. I haven’t slept since 5:30 AM eastern time on July 6, 2020 a total of 26 hours. My 12 PM mountain time (2 PM eastern) flight from Denver on July 6th took off on time. Somewhere near South Bend, Indiana (according to the captain’s announcement) the captain told us that due to severe thunderstorms, Newark is at a ground stop, this means that no flights are taking off and none are landing. He stated that we will be in a holding pattern over Pittsburgh, but due to fuel concerns as well as the number of hours the crew can work, we may have to divert the flight. At this point we were looking, at best, an arrival at 6:30 PM (flight was supposed to land at 5:35). After about an hour the captain announces that the conditions at Newark are not improving and we are diverting to Washington Dulles International Airport in Virginia. At this point we have several upset passengers who will be missing their connecting flight at Newark (if Newark lifts the ground stop).

We land at Dulles at around 6 PM. We are told that unless you need to speak to a customer service representative, we should stay on the plane as the ground stop can lift as we refuel. About an hour later (7PM) we are told to de-plane but to stay near the gate as they are still waiting for news from Newark. At around 8 PM there is an announcement that the crew has reached their mandatory hours and needs to be replaced and they are trying to find a replacement crew otherwise the flight will be cancelled and we would be put up in a hotel overnight as there were no more flights to Newark that evening.

At around 9:30 PM they announced that they obtained a new crew and created a new flight and we are to go to another gate in another but connected terminal (terminal D to C) to be rebooked. The new flight was consolidating three flights into one. This flight was scheduled to take off at 11 PM as the ground stop was lifted. I stood in line and got a new ticket for this flight from Dulles to Newark. Around 10:30 PM (keep in mind this is already 8.5 hours after I left Denver) there was an announcement that they are waiting for a flight attendant to arrive, ironically from Denver and once they have the full crew compliment, we can then board and get to Newark. At this point I was looking at a 1:40 AM arrival time. I figured, this isn’t great, but if I get home by 2:45 I might get a short nap in.

The flight attendant arrived a little after midnight and it was discovered, unbeknownst to the gate agents, that this person was over their allowable hours and this “new” flight has been cancelled and we will get hotel accommodations and be booked on the 10:30 AM flight out of Dulles today (the 7th). This was shortly before 12:30 AM.

Since I have work today, this was not something I could do, nor it would be silly to sleep overnight just to fly from VA to NJ. I went to the main terminal and found the Hertz shuttle. He wouldn’t take me to Hertz unless I had a reservation. I quickly pulled up the web site and booked myself a Hyundai sedan. He then was able to drive me over. I go into the office area, give them my credit card and license and rent a car for about $100 and begin my 250-mile drive from Dulles International Airport to Newark Liberty International Airport (whose route takes me past my house). The biggest issue I had is that in VA and MD there were no toll-takers and you either had to have exact change or an EZ Pass. For one toll in VA I had enough change to be able to pay it, but not for the others. I know this is no big deal as I will get a bill in the mail at some point. Luckily in Delaware and NJ they had toll takers, so I was able to pay using bills. Since the agreement obligated me to refuel, I refueled in NJ in Hamilton on the Turnpike. I arrive at the airport a little before 5 AM and slowly navigate the craziness of Newark (remember, at this point I’ve been awake for nearly 23 hours) to find where to drop the car off. I finally find it (it wasn’t easy) but there was no one for which to return the car. I park it, leave the key in the car and take my stuff. I go into what I think is the terminal (it’s not) and find someone to “return” the car to.

At around 5:15 AM I took the AirTrain (first time for me at Newark) to Terminal A. I call the off-site parking people to pick me up and there was no answer. So now I am stuck at Newark less than 2 miles from my car. I try calling again and someone sleepily answers the phone and tells me they are on their way and where to meet them. I go to the spot and they were there within two minutes. I get taken over to the lot and I easily found my car within 2-3 minutes. I was never so happy to see my own car! I scan my reservation QR code (naturally charged for an extra day) and get on the NJ Turnpike in the opposite direction I came 30 minutes earlier. At this point the sun has risen, so without sleeping I saw it set in Virginia and rise in NJ.

No sooner do I go to the Turnpike, I see all the vehicles are diverted to the car lane as there was a crash in the truck lane (a bad one). Normally I take 1 & 9 home, but I figured this was going to be faster. I was stuck in traffic for about 10 minutes (luckily it was early) and I got home at around 6:40 AM. So, when Dad called at 7, I was home for not five minutes, but twenty, however, I hadn’t eaten in 24 hours by then and had work at 7:30 so I had to run out and get something before work started.

Welcome To My New Site!

You may be thinking that the site looks pretty much the same as it always been.  Recently my web host provider, Surpass, who I have been using since 2005 dramatically increased their prices.  Essentially my web host costs would have gone from around $60/year to over $300.  At the same time, my domain registrar, Yahoo Small Business has been steadily increasing their prices as well.  I decided to simplify things and moved my domain registration and web host provider to TMD Hosting in which I am now paying the equivalent of what I used to pay for domain and web hosting.  Additionally, I don’t have bandwidth or usage restrictions.  Now all I have to do is get back to blogging!  Look for new posts coming soon.

Chat With Adam’s Uncles & More About Wendy

Over the weekend I had the opportunity to chat with Adam’s uncles, Bill and Seth (via two separate conversations) and got to find out more about them as well as Wendy. I never thought in my entire life that I would ever get to talk to someone who is genetically related to me. While it is hard to explain, the fact that I got the opportunity to do that was both a surreal, interesting, nerve-wracking and exciting experience. With both calls I didn’t know what to expect. While planned, I didn’t draw up a list of questions I wanted to ask, I decided to let the conversation flow naturally and see how it transpired. It was interesting to get the perspectives of both of Adam’s uncles on Wendy and their relationship with her. In the case of Bill, being only a few years younger I got the sense that the relationship was more brother-sister, where with Seth, being ten years younger than Wendy (and only ten years older than Adam) was more parent/child. Both conversations sort-of had the same structure. I asked about Wendy, what was her personality, details regarding the circumstances of giving Adam up for adoption and how she passed away. I then told them about my life and family history, though a lot of that is easily gleaned from this blog as well as my Facebook posts. I also discovered that they were curious about me and were very excited to find out what became of the “mysterious” Adam. Like myself, they even discussed it with their friends and family.

    So, what did I find out about Wendy Wood (nee Madway)? I found out that she died from tongue cancer. She never smoked but it can be caused by a bacterial infection, which is what happened with Wendy. I won’t go into the details of what I was told, but from the explanation she sadly had a horrible time of it. I’ve had various mouth issues (impacted bicuspids, baby teeth not falling out, braces, etc.)., while I do take fairly good care of my teeth, I’m going to be extra vigilant. In talking to Bill and Seth, both described Wendy as difficult, argumentative but also caring and having a heart of gold. I know this is more of a nurture over nature thing, but anyone who knows me knows that I can certainly be argumentative and difficult at times, I’ll let others decide the other (good) part. I got a sense that while Wendy was a very private person, and kept Adam a secret, there was a sense of curiosity. I asked both Bill and Seth if given the opportunity, if she would’ve wanted to meet Adam. Both said that she probably wondered whatever became of the child she gave up and most likely would’ve wanted to know and perhaps meet me. According to Seth, he got the sense that she may have even considered trying to find Adam, but that is all speculation. Seth being so much younger never really knew about Adam until after Wendy’s passing, while Bill, being that much closer in age, did know but it was never discussed. I found out that Wendy was dating someone when she became pregnant with Adam and it is inferred based on the conversation I had with Bill, that this “someone” was most likely Adam’s father. During Wendy’s pregnancy, she went to New York City to live with an aunt. My understanding is that her relationship with this aunt, who would be Adam’s great aunt, was a difficult one.

    Education was very important in the Madway family. Pete Madway, Wendy’s father graduated from Harvard (yes, that Harvard) and proceeded to get an MBA from that university as well as a second Master’s Degree, however, Seth was unsure if the second degree was also from there. Pete worked in insurance and finance, which co-incidentally is a hobby of mine, a taste I got from my own grandfather, Frank. Wendy herself, who had a good career working for the New Jersey Division of Taxation as an administrator, never graduated from college, despite her father’s strong encouragement. Unlike Wendy, both Bill & Seth graduated from college, University of Wisconsin and University of Pennsylvania respectively, sorry guys, I’m a Hoosiers fan, go

I always known I was born Jewish. When my parents were going through the adoption process, one of the things that Mrs. Wentworth, the social worker who handled the adoption asked is if my parents were observant. My mom interpreted this as that my biological family were Orthodox. I found out this wasn’t the case. Bill & Edie were Conservative-Reform and that Seth’s family keeps kosher and goes to I think, a reform synagogue in Rochester, NY. While Seth himself has not been to Israel, both of his daughters have been. I myself grew up in a religiously, a right-of center Jewish household who kept kosher both at home and out (never ate non-kosher foods/meat/fish). I went to a “Conservodox” synagogue (Conservative synagogue with an Orthodox rabbi) that was not egalitarian. I have since rebelled of sorts since then and no longer keep kosher, though I won’t eat shellfish and avoid pork but cheeseburgers are yummy.

At some time in the future I certainly hope to meet both Bill & Seth and while Seth does travel a lot and lives approximately 329 miles (529 km) away in Rochester, Bill lives a mere 61 miles (98 km) away. Ironically, Wendy’s town of work, Trenton is the halfway point.

Adam Madway’s Family

While Adam and I are biologically the same person, I do not identify as myself as Adam, so going forward Adam will be referenced in the 3rd person whereas any first person references will be related to Michael.  Below are a couple of photos generously provided to me by Bill Madway, Adam’s uncle via Facebook.  In the first photo below from the 1960’s are, going from left to right, Adam’s grandparents Edith (died August 3, 2007) and Pete (October 29, 1926- July 7, 2000), Seth is in the front, Bill behind him and Wendy (1951-2010) to the right.  While I will have to see if my parents still have physical photos of me as a child (some of my grade school years is posted on Facebook), there is a very strong resemblance when looking at Wendy as well as Seth.  The photo was taken in Levittown, PA in front of their home.  The 2nd photo is from about twenty years ago (so late 90’s one would presume).  It shows from front to back and left to right Adam’s cousins Arial and Tori (sorry, unsure which is which), their mother Wendy (Seth’s wife, Adam’s aunt), Adam’s cousin David (Bill’s son), Seth (Adam’s uncle), Edith and Pete who are Adam’s grandparents (shoot that explains the receding hairline that I have), Bill, Adam’s other uncle, Wendy who is Adam’s mother and Megan (Bill’s wife and Adam’s aunt).  Below that, I may have found an even older photo of Adam’s grandfather.  Also included is a brief video of Adam’s aunt and uncle talking about their best Jewish moments. If all goes as planned, I will have a phone conversation this Saturday, so stay tuned for more on this ever unfolding story.


Call Me Adam?

Some of what I am about to explain is fact, while some of it is interpolation.

Wendy L. Wood (nee Madway), age 58, passed away on January 21, 2010.  She was an administrator for the New Jersey State Tax Department who resided in Levittown, Pennsylvania.  Sister of Bill (Megan) Madway of Philadelphia, Pennsylvania and Seth (Wendy) Madway of Rochester, New York.  Wendy was born in Pennsylvania.

Approximately 35 years earlier a 20-year-old Wendy Madway, who by then had attended two years of college, went to the Helene Fuld Hospital in Trenton, NJ.  At around 7:55 AM on a late winter’s morning, she gave birth to a healthy 5 lb. 15 oz. baby, whom she named Adam.  Dr. James A Gribbin assisted with the caesarian birth on that day after the Ides of March.

Being unmarried, Wendy gave up young Adam Madway for adoption.  Approximately three months later Adam, known as Baby M, was adopted by Kenneth and Carol Bernstein and renamed Michael P. Bernstein.

On March 7, 2017 Michael remembered that a law was passed unsealing the original birth certificates of adopted children, which can be used for informational purposes only.  Under this law, an almost 45-year-old man, filled out the form from the Office of Vital Statistics, provided two forms of identification, and a processing fee of $25.

March 29, 2017, Michael decides to check his mail early in the morning.  Included amongst the junk mail was a photo copy of his original, thought to never be seen, birth certificate.  While he now knows the name of his mother, the father, as listed on the certificate, is unknown.  That may be a mystery that is never solved.

Michael, once, even if briefly, known as Adam, did not find photos of the late Wendy L. Wood, but did find photos and even a video of what is presumed to be his biological uncles as well as, through marriage the other Wendy Madway.  Adam/Michael apparently does not have any siblings but has at least two female cousins through Seth and Wendy and at least one male cousin through Bill Madway.

It doesn’t change a thing (click the link) for Michael.  His parents who he loves, and loves him will always be Kenneth and Carol, but it does solve an enduring mystery about his early life.

I called my parents and essentially read them this post.  They were supportive and happy for me.  They always were in favor of me looking for my biological family and filling in some of that mystery.  It could not have gone any better.

[pdf-embedder url=”https://starthan.net/wp/wp-content/uploads/2017/03/Adam-Madway-Birth-Certificate.compressed.pdf” title=”Adam Madway Birth Certificate.compressed”]